Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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