I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
