i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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