Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
