ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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