pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
