Sponge bath it is.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
