How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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