Me too!
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
