Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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