it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
