if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
