woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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