just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
