I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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