i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
