love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
