We won't sleep together?
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
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