You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
