i just google imaged poop.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I'm really busy with my period
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