Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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