my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
