There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
