I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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