Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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