Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
