Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize