Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
3pm strippers are depressing
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
