Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
