They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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