Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
