I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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