Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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