I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
