Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
