Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
The power of my boobs compel you
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
