she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
