He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
His nipple licking is glorious
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