Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
