my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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