I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I just had sex on a roof
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
