I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
