he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
