I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
