Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
