fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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