and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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