his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize