She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
