She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
